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Newsletter vol. 20 - I am not the same person (the impact of the pandemic)

What a beautiful day! The sky is blue, the sun is shining – I love Springtime! 🐣🌞🌼

So, if you’ve read my past newsletters you will know by now that although I talk the self-care talk, I’m not always the best at walking the walk! When I wrote my book, I was absolutely at my peak – I was the most mentally and physically fit I’ve ever been. I had a solid morning routine and was completely focussed on created a healthy body and mind. I was becoming more confident in my body and I felt like I had the whole self-care thing sorted! That was until the pandemic hit and I have been battling with myself since 😩. I feel like the lockdowns really have re-wired my brain and I don’t feel like I am the same person as I was pre-craziness.

I have coped by eating 🍫🍪🍟. My thought process has definitely been one of, ‘I want it so I’m going to have it! I am not going to restrict myself anymore!’ I have tried to convince myself that this has been an act of self-compassion as I’ve allowed myself to have treats and have not been on a super restrictive diet like I was before, but I am no longer convinced of this! Food has definitely been my comfort and probably protection from the outside world. Quite often carrying extra weight can unconsciously act like a protective barrier which can be why, for some, it can be hard to shift. Your conscious mind wants you to lose a few pounds to fit into your Summer clothes but your unconscious mind has other ideas! Your brain is not concerned with how good you look in your shorts, it just wants to protect you. 💪🦹

We have all felt emotional threats to some extent over the last 2 years which we will have found a way to deal with. My husband has definitely dealt with things by booking everything imaginable! His thought process is now, ‘Life is short. You don’t know what’s round the corner. Let’s squeeze as much into life as we can’. We’ve been to the theatre 3 times already; to watch the rugby twice; we have tickets for 5 concerts (including Gaga which I’m super excited about!!!), a festival, as well as our belated holiday to Florida 🥳🎉. I mean these things are all completely amazing but as a HSP, the thought of doing all of these is exhausting and sometimes positive, exciting things can just be as draining and stressful as the not so great things.🥱

The pandemic has fundamentally changed our beliefs. How have they changed yours? Do you have a different outlook to life, love and health to what you did 2 years ago?🤔🤔🤔

The thing is these beliefs probably worked for us at the time to help us to cope with the uncertainty but long term, neither mine or Andrew’s beliefs are great and could create their own problems. I will definitely not fit into my Summer shorts if I keep allowing myself to indulge and the extra weight could lead to health issues and if Andrew keeps buying the world, then money will be tight and might leave us short for other things (like our ever-rising electricity bill!)

You’ve heard it a million times – it’s all about balance.⚖

It’s about having compassion and understanding for ourselves while at the same time creating healthy habits that serve us, in the short term and long term.

Andrew and I have been back to the gym every morning apart from one in the last week and although I haven’t lost any weight yet. I know that I’m re-creating healthy habits, a love for exercise again all whilst spending quality time with Andrew which is the most important thing to me. The weight will fall off when it’s ready. It would be nice if it was in time for Florida but if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen. I’m not going to kill myself in the process, as I know looking back on photos from the last time we went in 2019, as a size 10, I still wasn’t completely happy with myself then and didn’t allow myself to enjoy the amazing ice cream!🍦🍨

Be patient with yourselves. Be kind. Start small, be consistent and amazing things will happen 💥

Have a magical week, you beautiful people 🌈💜🎉

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