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Newsletter vol. 29 - 36 days and counting! (Getting to the root/getting excited about things)

It’s only 36 days until we go to Florida!🎉 I think we started on something like 390 days! A lot of people can’t understand why we spend so much money to go on a holiday but in my opinion, there really is nothing like it! I love EVERYTHING about it – how friendly everyone is, the colours, the music, the characters, the amazing service, the incredible food, the attention to detail, the imagination and creativity, the laughter, seeing my boys faces – just pure bliss! A perfect fit for our family. I feel at home, like a child again, like the real me.

So if it’s that magical, why aren’t I excited? 🤔

This has baffled my husband as he knows how much I love Disney. We save up for 2 years to go, countdown each time and meticulously plan our itinerary so that we can squeeze the juice out of the time we have there. I’ve been feeling a bit meh, with thoughts popping in that we’re not going to end up going.

I’ve been confused by this and if I’m honest, a little disappointed. This is how I used to feel about everything – unable to let myself get excited until I was actually there. Since gaining an understanding of the Law of Attraction, my anxiety has pretty much disappeared as I now believe that the thoughts I put out there will attract those things to me. I’ve witnessed this time and time again! For example, I’ve worried about not having enough money, have just started saving and then the washing machine breaks. On the other hand, when I have thought that good things are on their way and I’ve been grateful for what I have, I’ve received unexpected discounts, small wins on the lottery, random cheques in the post.😎

So, I’ve reflected on why I’m not excited and I think it’s because of the lasting effects of what has happened over the last couple of years. We had booked to go to Florida last March but it was cancelled because of Covid, as were lots of plans. I know you hear me and are probably as fed up of talking about Covid as I am! The truth is, that even though things are pretty much back to normal now, many of us are still experiencing the after effects of it. This has reminded me of how I felt when I was younger.

When I was a teenager, my mum and dad separated and got back together many times. There were so many plans that were cancelled and holidays that we never went on because of something that had happened in their relationship. I remember feeling embarrassed when my friends asked how my trip or holiday was and I replied, ‘Oh, we didn’t end up going in the end’. It got to the point where I never told my friends about any of our plans to protect myself from the disappointment and embarrassment. I had always been an anxious child but my anxiety definitely ramped up during this time with my head being mostly filled with ‘What if’ scenarios. All of this has been triggered again due to the last couple of years, to the point where I’ve thought there is no point in getting excited until I’m there. This, paired with the hundreds of flights that are being cancelled, has left me feeling doubtful that we’ll get there. 😳

No-one is born with anxiety. Anxiety is symptom of things that have happened to you.

If you relate to this, I wonder where your anxiety started?

All of my clients create a timeline of their life before we start our coaching sessions to help us to identify the root of any anxieties or confidence issues. This can be a really helpful exercise to do. All you need to do is write down all of the positive and negative events in your life that could have had an impact on how you feel today.

It could look something like this...


Significant Event

Impact this had on you

1987 (age 5)

Brother was born

I liked looking after him but I felt pushed out as mum was always busy.

Now, this exercise comes with a bit of a warning. It can be an incredibly useful, therapeutic process but it can obviously trigger emotions as you bring to mind things that you’ve buried for a little while. Make sure that you give yourself plenty of time and space to do this so that you can process what arises. It may be helpful for you to have someone to talk to - a friend, a counsellor - if it uncovers anything too painful. Once you’ve uncovered the triggers, look at that event again through your adult eyes and ask yourself…

Is this definitely what happened?

Could there have been another viewpoint?

Could there have been more to it?

Could I make this mean something different?

Did this person mean it in this way?

Could there have been something going on for them that was unaware of?

What could I learn from this event?

What positives can I take from it?

This will help you to reframe it in your mind and let go of the unhelpful emotion attached to it.

I just used to think that this was who I was. I was a worrier. My family are all worriers. I just need to accept it and there was nothing I could do about it. This is not true AT ALL. Nobody needs to live with anxiety. You may naturally be a slightly more anxious person but no one needs to live with it if it is stopping you from doing things and getting in the way of you living.

I understand that you can’t just stop being anxious. Believe me I know! It can take time to process things from the past and learn a new way of thinking. I haven’t found a magic strategy yet that can just take anxiety away completely (some of the NLP techniques come pretty close though!). It takes for you to be a little firm with yourself and make yourself do the thing that you’re fearful of or put a stop to the anxious thoughts that feel like a runaway train. Tell yourself very gently and with heaps of empathy …‘I understand why I’m thinking that but that thought is not helpful. Instead I’m going to think…….’

I’ve had to do this today. The more I think that something’s going to happen to stop us from going, the more likely I am to manifest it! So, instead I’ve got to work planning our itinerary, booking our transfers, sorting our travel insurance and shopping! WE WILL GO TO FLORIDA!! WE WILL GO TO FLORIDA!! WE WILL GO TO FLORIDA!!

And do you know what…worst case scenario is that we get our money back and go another time! The world will not come to an end!

So, the next time you book to do something…GET EXCITED ABOUT IT! Imagine yourself being there, feeling how you will feel. Send positive thoughts out to the Universe and make your dreams come true!

Have a magical week, you beautiful people 🌈💜🎉

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